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Couples Counselling - Marriage Counselling

Love brought you together but as life’s pressures ensue, your relationship may suffer. Having children, losing a job, moving house, emptying the nest, extra family relationships, and health issues can be a catalyst for relationship breakdown. It’s rare that a partner is blind-sided completely by their partner (though this does happen to some) but rather a gradual drifting apart that is the greatest threat to relationship satisfaction.

Picture of a couple talking to each other
As it is often difficult to perceive a slowly drifting separation, here are some signs that you and your partner should seek couples counselling:

  • You remember and dwell on the negative aspects of the relationship more than the positive.
  • Conflict rarely gets resolved.
  • There is violence or abuse (physical, emotional, drug or alcohol).
  • You rarely laugh together.
  • You feel you or your partner are having or in danger of having an affair.
  • You avoid sharing your true feelings with your partner to minimise conflict.
  • Depression or other health problems are recurring.
  • There seems to be secrets and trust is missing.
  • Loss of desire for sexual intimacy.

In couples counselling, you and your partner meet together with the therapist where the relationship, rather than the two individuals, is the “client”. Sometimes couples counselling works best alongside individual counselling and your therapist can advise and arrange for this as well.

Expectations in Couples Counselling

One common goal of couples therapy is to enhance communication skills. This involves learning to express thoughts and feelings openly and honestly, while also actively listening to your partner without judgment. Through communication exercises and techniques taught by the therapist, couples can develop more effective ways of expressing themselves and understanding each other.

Another typical goal is to address underlying issues that may be contributing to relationship difficulties. This could involve exploring past traumas, childhood experiences, or patterns of behavior that are negatively impacting the relationship. By understanding these underlying factors, couples can work towards healing and creating a more fulfilling partnership.

Additionally, couples often seek therapy to rebuild trust and intimacy. This may involve addressing trust issues stemming from past betrayals or conflicts, and finding ways to reconnect emotionally and physically. Therapists may use techniques such as role-playing, trust-building exercises, and homework assignments to help couples rebuild trust and intimacy over time.

Overall, the goals of couples therapy are tailored to the specific needs and concerns of each couple. Whether it’s improving communication, resolving conflicts, rebuilding trust, or rediscovering intimacy, couples therapy provides a supportive environment for couples to work through their issues and strengthen their relationship.

Related

Family Therapy
Consider exploring family therapy to enhance communication, resolve conflicts, and strengthen your family’s bonds, creating a more harmonious and understanding home environment that benefits everyone.
Premarital and Remarriage Counselling
As you prepare for marriage, using tools like the Prepare-Enrich Assessment, can enhance your communication skills and understanding of each other, addressing common marital issues and strengthening your commitment and intimacy.
Tim Allyn
Individual, Couples, Young Persons, Pre-Marital and Family Counsellor with Dundee Counselling. Tim has over 10,000 hours (14 years) experience in counselling and has a special interest in helping people heal from their past trauma and abuse.
Frequently Asked Questions
If you’re new to counselling / therapy, here are some helpful answers to the top questions people ask when seeking out a counselling service. For any others please send us a question via our contact page.
Online Counselling - Teletherapy
Online counselling therapy is a way for you to engage in counselling using internet technology such as telephone or webcam video. See if online counselling is the right option for you!
Emilie Clarke
Trainee Counsellor with Dundee Counselling. With 20 years experience in pastoral care, and now in her third year of professional counselling training, Emilie is convinced that building a compassionate and trusting relationship with her clients is the foundation for progress and change.